We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Jak Locke Goes Too Far

by Jak Locke

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      $3 USD  or more

     

1.
Everyone here has a dream and a story Ideas by the thousands to spare Yes, inside every mind is a wealth of experiences And whatever they are, I don't care Because what's worse than a person? Two people! It's true And three people is worse by far Add more and you'll see that the trend comes to be The more people involved, the lower the bar And so, if you see me, just keep walking by We'll share more respect cuz we'll never know why And I won't give a shit about you If you'll do the same for me too Look at me strumming this ugly guitar Look at me looking right back Maybe you hate everything that you've heard "The jukebox was better, you hack" Isn't it fun to feel superior But there's always a flip side, you know Singing stupid songs like this is my living So have fun at your pointless fuckin job tomorrow And please, if you see me, just keep walking by We'll share more respect cuz we'll never know why And I won't give a shit about you If you'll do the same for me too Don't be my friend You'll just ask me to help you move Don't be my friend I'll just make you come to all my shows Don't flirt with me I'll just wonder if you've got crabs Don't talk to me Neither one of us is that interesting And please, if you see me, just keep walking by We'll share more respect cuz we'll never know why And I won't give a shit about you If you'll do the same for me too If you'll do the same for me too
2.
If on the day we met you had one hour left to live before away you'd waste Really, nothing for me would change, and that's really not too strange Cuz I'd have no idea that was the case If you went and killed yourself because of some depression That you were too depressed to get diagnosed You'd have nothing to fear for I would still be here I swear I'd even help you overdose And if you were cut to ribbons in a sawmill Or if you got yourself impaled upon a pike I'd love you still, no doubt Even with your intestines hanging out I swear to you my love, that's what I like I swear to you I wouldn't ever cry, not even if you died Not even if you died Not even if you died Not even if you died
3.
10 Woman Man 02:50
I's about fed up with hearing people jive You know jealousy could eat a man alive Well I'm just another fella trying to do what he can If you wanna be my woman, I'm a ten woman man But can't have eleven women, be a lowdown shame I'm a ten woman man for sure Spend your time with one girl and you'll just get bored It ain't right to let no woman be ignored It don't matter what the color, long as she's red hot And if I want it a little different, I can choose from a lot But can't have eleven women, be a lowdown shame I'm a ten woman man for sure Having such a lovely night under the stars Ooh, but say! Who's that red haired number by the bar? Well, you were woman number one and I loved you so But she's prettier than you so you gotta go Can't have eleven women, be a lowdown shame I'm a ten woman man for sure I just finished with the blonde in the hot tub But now which one was I meeting at the club? Well, I guess I'll find out when I get there and I hope she's clean I had to drop a couple-a dirties, if you know what I mean Can't have eleven women, be a lowdown shame I'm a ten woman man for sure Them uptight girls, they leave when I arrive You know jealousy could eat a girl alive Well there maybe be a vacancy by end of the week But honey you gotta understand, a fella's gotta sleep Can't have eleven women, be a lowdown shame I'm a ten woman man for sure I'm a ten woman man for sure I'm a ten woman man for sure Whoa I'm a ten woman man for sure!
4.
Oh it's carnival time in New Orleans, everybody's throwing up Gunshots heard about a block away, so we's bound to get wrote up From the New York Times to the L.A. News, no more reports of Katrina blues Spread the word, we paid our dues, it's a good place to die again Yeah it's carnival time in New Orleans, everything smells like shit Plastic beads and smoked-up weed and a thousand and one armpits But you're too drunk to tell at all or even notice the man wearing nothing at all So go drink a beer with him and have a ball, it's a good place to make friends Yes it's carnival time in New Orleans, everyone forgot how to drive Colorado wreck in the neutral ground, I wonder how they made it here alive Now I got a show at half past ten, I might get there at 3AM And maybe next week I'll get home again, it's a good time to be late Oh, it's carnival time in New Orleans, everyone's all wound up That's a nasty bruise you got, I guess you should have let Grandma have that cup Well you can have my share of the scene, I'll stay home and I'll stay clean Yes it's carnival time in New Orleans and it's better on TV
5.
So it's that time of year again to drink all the beer again because you spoke your mind How could you be so rude, you knew she's been in a bad mood because she's in one all the time But that ringing in your ears, it's got to cease And you'd do anything if she'll just give you peace So just say that you're sorry, if you don't know why, don't worry, just go win your sweetheart back The traffic was insane but then you found an open lane and now you're home with your paycheck But instead of friendly greetings, you're receiving screams and beatings and a knife against your neck "It's another woman!" she says in a voice filled with hate "Why else would you walk in here three minutes late?" Before she opens up your jugular just hand the paycheck bucks to her and win your sweetheart back You've been under lots of stress and so some cardiac arrest has nearly stopped your life today While they were doing surgery, it was on your anniversary and now there's hell to pay So she tore out all your stitches and demands a night out as you hold your insides in with your left hand But you only need one hand to drive so suck it up and look alive and go and win your sweetheart back Oh buddy, why'd you do it? Things were great and then you blew it, now she's ironing your face You get a sentimental feeling as she lifts you to the ceiling with a punch below the waist She motions toward the stove with a gun And you don't even know what it is you done But if you want to feel her lovin, better climb into that oven so you'll win your sweetheart back She finally had enough and so she's turned to playing rough and now she chainsawed off your leg While scrambling for a ligature you bled on all the furniture so her forgiveness you should beg But you consider that, just maybe, this is bad That was the only left leg you ever had But so you'll have a little limp, now buddy don't be such a wimp, just go and win your sweetheart back Win your sweetheart back
6.
Sleazy Sexy 03:52
Aw yeah Everybody knows where the ladies are at this time of night They all with me baby, oh! That is, they all gonna be with me Because, because I got that special soft serve kinda love Kinda oozes all over the place? Yeah, you know what I mean I know how to make a woman scream Oh yes, women are screaming at me all the time My moms was yelling at me just the other day for leaving the TV tray out But enough about me. Haha. Let's talk about you. You and me. Now baby, tell me this Have you ever done it on the moon? Well, nobody has Because you need to wear spacesuits on the moon and that would be kinda awkward Kinda awkward, I kinda wish I hadn't said that Kinda awkward like the feeling you get when I say I want to be the man in your closet watching you undress I'm sleazy, you're sexy, they both start with an 's' And when you're trying to ignore me and my line of sight I tell my friends I was with you last Saturday night That's right And girl, when they ask why you're not talking to me I just tell them that's how I roll I've moved on to something else already And they don't need to know that I'm really talking about internet porn And I haven't really lied, you know, I was sitting at this same table last weekend watching you dance with your friends We were in the same room so provided we're going by Webster's definitions, I really was with you With you and all your friends at the same time I want to be the man in your closet watching you undress I'm sleazy, you're sexy, they both start with an 's' And when you're trying to ignore me and my line of sight I'm memorizing every part of you for later tonight That's right Yeah, all right, nuff nuff talk, time for some of my magical action, aw yeah Tonight i take my stand, I don't need no wingman No, I'm riding this solo, first class That girl in the grey, yeah the one who's looking this way Tonight I'm gonna stick it in her ooh ooh ooooooh ooh Have you ever been in a crowded room and were talking to one of your friends And the whole room goes quiet right before you say something you didn't necessarily want the whole room to hear Well, that just happened And now I'm that guy And so I try to play it off I say "can you believe he told her he wanted to stick it in her ass?" Aw, but it's too late, isn't it So now I'm really riding solo tonight But baby, it's all your loss I was just trying to do you a favor, share the wealth So yeah, you damn right I'll go fuck myself And lady, let me educate you on a little fact: I'm so good I bet you I don't even last thirty seconds So what you got to say now? Damn I want to be the man in your closet watching you undress I'm sleazy, you're sexy, they both start with an 's' And when you're trying to ignore me and my line of sight I'm memorizing every part of you for later tonight That's right Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh, ooh
7.
Say, what's that coming above? It's getting cold and the sun's all dim Low rent gamble in between all the levees Where they hope you know how to swim You've got one assurance God don't care if you don't have insurance Traffic jam It's a traffic jam And the interstate's a parking lot I need a reservation, do you have any rooms? "Well, I guess that depends how much money you've got" Let's have a hurricane party! Skeleton bones mixed with the Bacardi, oh! Shit and corpses, corpses and shit Shit and corpses, corpses and shit Shit and corpses, corpses and shit, oh yeah! Fuck fuck fuck the hurricane Fuck fuck fuck the hurricane Fuck fuck fuck the hurricane Fuck fuck fuck the hurricane

about

Some of these songs have gotten me thrown out of some of the finest in uptight establishments! Sometimes because they misinterpreted the joke, sometimes because I really did ask for it.

Whether they're lampooning various eras of male chauvinism or being honest about Mardi Gras and hurricanes, most of these songs at one time or another ended up offending somebody enough to get me removed from the stage, from Tulsa, OK's overpriced restaurant scene to Covington, LA's famed White Flight Avenue, to even Mobile, AL's dumpy dives.

credits

released December 18, 2012

Jak Locke: all music, lyrics, instruments, vocals
cover photography: Kevin Hendricks

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Jak Locke New Orleans, Louisiana

Jak Locke is a multi-genre songwriter and performer based in and native to New Orleans, LA.

contact / help

Contact Jak Locke

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this album or account

If you like Jak Locke, you may also like: